Our social worker came to visit today to do an intial post-placement visit. Rayne rolled over on cue, played on her tummy, and smiled perfectly! After showing off Rayne, she asked more seriously how we were doing as a family. These questions force me to reflect and process - how are we doing? I was able to articulate this feeling Jeeva and I were sensing when we said that her presence here makes us feel more complete.
We had a long time to make room in this family for Rayne. We talked, we prayed, we dreamed, we laughed, we asked questions about how it would be when Rayne arrived. Since we never quite knew when she would come, we were always addressing the near future. Little did we know that each time we talked, we carved out another little space for a daughter and a sister. Every time we anticipated her coming by planning, by disciplining, by encouraging the boys to be more independent we were all sacrificing a piece of living selfishly and easily in the present to welcome her presence in our family. Now, her coming doesn't seem to be pushing anyone aside. It seems, instead, that there was a hole carved right in the middle of our family waiting to be filled by her. Nathan, our four year old, has even settled into the middle child role with pride, love, helpfulness, and self - control. And, he has stopped asking when Rayne will be headed back to Ethiopia! He, too, has helped her to fit into the place we carved out for her. In fact, a belly laughing giggle from Rayne has only been heard, so far, in response to her brothers, especially Nathan. They have bonded.
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